I’ve been working on another book about hypnosis and wrote a chapter called “The Hypnotist as Authority”. I realized what I wrote applies to more than just hypnotists. The idea of having authority is a powerful tool anyone can use. As I’ve written, being an authority is about constantly working to keep your life in order. I’m certainly not saying that I have no challenges, just that constantly working on being a better person has some real long term benefits. Those people who seem to have some sense of authority are constantly working to “get their act together”. A hypnotist who has such authority is one I respect.
Here’s the excerpt on Authority.
The Hypnotist as Authority
As a hypnotist your responsibility is to give instructions (some say “suggestions”) to your client so they end up making the changes they want in their life. In that relationship of hypnotist/subject you are the authority, the person being relied on and trusted to lead them. You are an authority in your field. That doesn’t mean you boss them around barking hypnotic commands and instruction. It mean you must behave in a way the makes them want to follow you.
Authority is demonstrated by more than just confidence. Authority is demonstrated by having your act together and being a healthy well rounded person, comfortable with what you are doing and confident in your ability.
Small changes you can make can immediately enhance your authority. Here are a few:
Be clean, well groomed and dress professionally.
Make your surroundings clean and professional looking.
Be on time.
Display certificates, awards and diplomas, news articles related to you.
Always sit above eye level of your hypnosis subject.
Be prepared for every meeting. Call your client by name and know what you will be doing.
Be unhurried in your actions, authorities are in control and have no need to rush.
Remove all filler words from your speech like “um”, “ah”, “you know”. They demonstrate a lack of discipline and uncertainty.
Be comfortable with silence. If you finish a sentence or ask a questions, SHUT UP and wait for reply.
Be comfortable making eye contact.
Avoid touching your face while speaking. This is a comforting behavior that demonstrates insecurity.
Listen intently. Make the other person feel interesting and important.
Give direction. Instruct your client where to sit and what to do. Don’t ask them, just tell them then shut up.
Show acceptance, appreciation and approval toward your client.
NEVER criticize or belittle your client (or anyone else).
Talk about yourself rarely and only if it will benefit the other person. They are not there to hear about you.
Let nothing surprise you.
Seeing authority from a bigger perspective there are a lot of things you can do to “get your act together”. You’ll notice the items on the next list are not things you can simply do and move on. They involve every part of your life and should be regularly focused on.
Live in a clean and organized environment. That means making your bed, have a clean car.
Get your finances in order. Pay your bills. Get rid of any debt.
Have a life outside of your work. Make it fun.
Keep your word.
Manage your time. Plan your day by prioritizing the activities of your day. Focus on the activities that have the long term payoffs.
Be a nice person. Treat the people in your life with love and respect.
Get the rest your body needs. Make it a part of your plan.
Start your day early. That requires going to bed at the right hour.
Accept responsibility for your life.
Meditate on the phrase “How you do anything is how you do everything.”
As mentioned real authority comes when you have all your life together. In that way there is nothing external, outside of the hypnosis practice, to distract you. Having your act together is a much longer term endeavor which has no conclusion.